CURSES
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"A curse is any expressed wish that some form of adversity or misfortune will befall or attach to one or more persons, a place, or an object." -Wikipedia

Let's talk about curse, do you guy have any curse or have cursed anybody ? 
Have you ever cursed yourself for being so stupid in the past ? Everything happen right now depend on you past self and everything that will happen in the future depend on your present self.
You still can change your future by changing your present self, but how can you change your present self if you still stuck with curses from your past self ?
Time is a very dangerous thing that we can't control, we can only control our routines or how we spend our time.
I have too many curses from my past self, like how I don't spend my teenage life by doing what I like, why I didn't choose the course that I like when I'm studying resulting dropping out from college and many more. 


But the curse that I want to talk is MY TEETH.
Damn I think I'm being cursed by God with my teeth.
So I have this damaged tooth (molar I think? left side), the tooth which I used to eat, my main biting tooth? I don't know how to explain it but the damaged tooth is my main tooth that I used to eat everyday. 
I went to dentist for several times just to repair it. I still remember the doctor at my first checkup reaction:
  "Mamamia, you have a very big hole on your tooth" While shaking his head.
But still he tried to patch it because he said I'm still young and I should not remove my tooth while I'm still young, tooth never growing back like hair or something like that. Except if the tooth is completely broken then you have to remove it.


The curse start when I'm still a little kid, I never went to dentist because like a normal human being, Im afraid of dentist.
So I only do teeth checkup once a year(my government give this "teeth checkup program" for student once per year) and never went to dentist after I finish school.
This tooth have been damaged since I'm in the middle school, so they patched it and I can use it until im 18, then the patch broken. 
Due to I'm afraid to go to the dentist, I change side to eat. I don't know the term but the point is, I use my right side teeth to eat. Until.....
The molar on the right side damage, then I can't eat comfortably because both side damaged. I have to eat very slowly and use the front side.


After a few year, which I still not go to dentist, I eat meat and I decide to bite it using the left side molar which I never use for several year. I just want to see what happen if I use it.
This, this is the time ladies and gentlemen. The time which my past self give me the biggest curse, the biggest fuck you to future self. The molar just broken, I don't know its not like it fully broken, some part of it just broken. 
And the shockwave, I can't explain what I felt when the meat crushing my molar, something just struck your brain. I scream like a little girl that night.
In my country, there's no dentist open at night so I have to deal with the pain until morning. I ate 12 painkiller, and some random medicines(I can't think properly that time, I ate anything that look like medicine or I think can take away the pain) my family kept just to make the pain go away but tough luck, it's never go away.
I went to the clinic next morning and the doctor said he can't do it because the hole is too big, and he gives me some antibiotics and more painkiller. I don't know what he said after but I'm in the state of "I want to kill him if he talk any longer".


Then I went to public dentist, which run by the government because my mom said they can do it because they have the proper equipments.
Of course they can do it but I have to wait for appointment. The dentist give me appointment, two week after the time I went there. I don't know why public hospital always give appointment ? I don't see any people with me or queing with me that time ? Maybe it's their procedure or whatever.
So I have to spend two week with the pain.
But, miracle do exist. When I arrived home, I can't feel any pain from my tooth, I try to touch it using my tongue and there's no pain at all.
By the time of the appointment, all the pain have gone, maybe due to the antibiotic the first clinic gave me.


And this is the time my past self fucked me again. There's no pain at all so I decided to bail the appointment, I never go to the appointment lol.
So, of course I never use the left side again after almost two weeks of the biggest pain in my life. But the right side of my teeth begin to damage as well, the damage became worst.
Until Im 25 I can't handle it anymore, both side of my teeth is damaged and both molars broken, so I can't eat properly anymore.
So I gather all my courages and went to the dentist, but the hole is getting bigger and all they can do is patch it or do root canal.
I want to remove it and the doctor said let's try patch it first until it totally broken, so I follow his advice.
Eventually, I can use my both side of my teeth after the patch but after two years I think, the patch broken and the left side molar damage even more.
And I have to go to different dentist because I moved from my hometown, unfortunately all the dentist I went here not as good as the one in my hometown.


Now, I have to go to the dentist every 6 month to repair the patch or patch it back. And I cannot eat hard food. 
Im planning to follow my first dentist advice which to keep patching the tooth until it totally broken, or maybe I'll go see him when I go visit my family back at my hometown.
Toothache really is my biggest curse, because the tooth is always in my mouth, it's feel like the tooth keep reminding me the pain it give on the past.
I know, I just have to remove the tooth to release the curse right ? But if I remove the tooth then it will make me feel awkward to eat, my mom have remove her molar and she said never remove it except if it totally broken(same as my first dentist advice). 

What about you, what is your biggest curse ??